I am not alone in what the world is going through with COVID-19. Fear and fatigue and reverting back to habits we thought we had conquered. So it was that I found myself five weeks ago filling my grocery cart with sugary treats.
After four-plus years on Keto I seemed to be falling into a dark hole where only sugary treats could save me.
Well, many pounds gained I was still at it, and baked a cherry pie last night. Honestly, I thought, “Oh, something to look forward to.”
I heard myself and said, “I do not know why I am doing this.” All that weight loss and feeling so great. I could not seem to help myself. Today a small thing happened. I just happened to be paying attention.
If you are suffering from loneliness and depression, do not be afraid to reach out to get help you may need.
After losing my home and beloved pet in the Paradise fire, I was slow to recover. The one pet I was able to save from the fire passed away nine weeks ago. Now I was really alone in the house.
I see now that I had someone to care for and to take good care of myself because she needed me. Suddenly the walls closed in. With one exception — my family bought a home in this beautiful place for me to live now. The deck in this house is magical. I can watch the fawns in the meadow, the baby turkeys and my clown squirrels. It has helped me to heal as nature often does for so many of us.
But today something changed.
So mama squirrel comes each day to the deck glass doors and gets a peanut or two. But I saw her baby three days ago venture out of the big tree close to my deck. The little squirrel looked at the peanut, picked it up and seemed puzzled as to where to start.
I saw him take the peanut and head down the stairs towards the trees. Curious as to which tree was his home.
He veered away from the trees and headed to the open meadow with that peanut tight in his little mouth. Suddenly I saw what he was doing and what I had forgotten to do. Plan ahead for the future. His mom said, “Eat one, save one.” As I watched him frantically looking to hide that treasure I thought, “He wants more then anything to eat that nut … but everything he knows inside is that he must save it for the future when he can come back for it.”
I applauded the strength it took for him so young and yet he was taught and was following what mama said what will work best for his future. But the biggest thing I felt was that he believes there is a future. But did I?
Did depression and fear take over? I had turned to my old habits that had not served me well health-wise.
The next sound I heard was a cherry pie, assorted treats and the sound of the garbage disposal. Tears came — but tears of relief.
Just feeling that the little squirrel has to make life-saving decisions and his life depends on it and so did mine today. I am hoping I can stay on track and continue with good health at 79 and not be afraid to be understanding should I slip and fall. Fear of the virus makes so many feel like, “Gosh am I next?” I am by nature a positive person and have always been a visual person.
SO like the butterflies and hummers and birds that visit our gardens, this little squirrel will never leave my heart. I believe nature can save us but we have to stop and watch to learn what they can teach us. One little nut, just one baby squirrel … oh what a good new day.
If you are suffering from loneliness and depression, do not be afraid to reach out to get help you may need. There is no shame in doing so. We are all doing the best we can. Oh, that poor innocent cherry pie.
Diane Davy lives in Penn Valley.
The Link LonkAugust 22, 2020 at 05:37AM
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Diane Davy: That poor cherry pie - The Union of Grass Valley
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